


Sometimes you just gotta bleach your hair in the middle of the night. And that's valid.

by cyberdumb



Category: Let's Play Cyberpunk Red - Polygon (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, I genuinely don't know how to tag this, M/M, Not Beta Read, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, They're all teens, Very slight mention of casual addiction, and i guess enabling of said casual addiction, but it's minor so just watch out for that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:21:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28556802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyberdumb/pseuds/cyberdumb
Summary: Dasha's agent rings at 2 am, and it's Vang0 going Through It™. So of course she brews a cup of coffee, picks up a can of Spunky Monkey and helps her frien- associate. They're not friends.(Loosely inspired by that one Knives Chau scene in Scott Pilgrim)Written for the 2020 Polygon's Cyberpunk Red Mini Big Bang event.
Relationships: Dapper Dasha & Vang0 Bang0, Vang0 Bang0/Burger Chainz (mentioned + implied unrequited)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 24
Collections: PCPR Mini Big Bang 2020





	Sometimes you just gotta bleach your hair in the middle of the night. And that's valid.

**Author's Note:**

> Folks, the fic I've been working on for far too long is finally here. And it's not that great.
> 
> [Check out Wild's artwork for the same event, inspired by this fic.](https://vengabang0.tumblr.com/post/639416391749042176/i-drew-a-scene-from-cyberdumb-s-fic-for)

“He's dating a fucking blonde girl” were the first words that Dasha heard as soon as she picked up her agent. It took her a moment to process everything she had just heard. She looked at the time, 1:47 am. “I hate his stupid guts!” Vang0’s voice over the agent sounded mad, but she was used to it. 

“Vang0, what are you talking about?” She attempted sitting up, but because of the darkness of her room she couldn’t see where she was putting her hands, so she ended up leaning awkwardly on one side, “is this about-”

“That guy in my english class,” Dasha could hear through the speakers the distinct sound of combat boots stepping on cement. What was Vang0 doing outside at this time, alone? “The one I told you about! Burger-”

“The one you’ve been crushing on for months and you’re too much of a coward to ask out?” Dasha already knew everything about this guy, Vang0 saw him on the first day of senior year in his english class and he hadn’t shut up about him ever since. 5’10, large and muscular shoulders, nice to everyone and just dense enough that everytime he said something you would automatically think “wow… thank fuck he’s attractive,” but not in an irritating way, you know?

Vang0 exhaled, which Dasha interpreted as a yes. “Well I couldn’t ask him out even if i wanted to,”

“Huh?” Dasha could hear the cogs in her own brain turning, trying to process what was being said to her.

“Because he’s dating a blonde g-” she heard Vang0 stop on his steps and his tone becoming more dry, “are you even listening to what I’m saying?”

Dasha yawned audibly and tried sitting up again. This time she succeeded. “Yeah, yeah, I’m listenin’. How did you find out about this and why did you decide to call me at nearly 2 am instead of just waiting until tomorrow?”

“I followed them and I saw them making out.”

“You fol- Vee, you’ve lost it.”

“This is not the worst thing you’ve seen me do.”

“It sure is weird though.”

“Whatever.”

Dasha heard through the agent the sound of automatic doors opening, “where the fuck are you right now?”

“Uh. The drug store around the corner from my apartment.”

“Wha-” she turned on the light at the side of her bed as if it would make her understand the situation more clearly, “can you, like, explain to me what are you doing there at 2 am?”

“I told you, he’s dating this blonde chick.”

“That explains absolutely nothing-”

“Can you come over?”

“It’s 2 am.”

“I’m coming to your house then. See you in 20, bye!”

“What? Vang0-” she couldn’t even start the sentence that he had already hung up on her.

Dasha got up and quietly sneaked downstairs to her kitchen, silently hoping that her parents didn’t hear her footsteps in the middle of the night. If Vang0 was coming over, and planned to stay, she might as well brew some coffee for herself.

She stared at her parents’ expensive coffee machine, thumb hovering the button to pour the coffee in her mug, when she heard a ding coming from her agent.

**from: Vang0.**

“i’m here” \- _2:13 am_

Dasha looked out of her kitchen’s window and, several floors down, standing on the sidewalk in front of her building’s entrance, she could see a small figure illuminated by the street lights. Long, dark and unkept hair framing the 18-year old’s face as he paced around and nervously looked at what Dasha imagined to be his agent.

She walked over to the intercom and pressed down a button with a stylized key printed on it, she heard the faint noise of the front door of the building open and put her mouth closer to the intercom’s mic, “be quiet.”

Less than a minute later, she opened the door to a disheveled Vang0, his brown hair was messy and he looked like he’d just walked out of a boxing match after losing. Dasha noticed he was holding some small containers in his hand pressed against his chest so he could hold all of them and have a free hand at the same time, but she couldn’t really see what they were.

He grabbed Dasha by her shoulder and walked straight to the bathroom that was on the opposite end of the room without uttering a word. He had been at Dasha’s apartment multiple times already, but she had never seen him walk so confidently in there. Once they were both inside, he shut the solid black wooden door close and turned to her.

Vang0 looked around the room for a bit, Dasha imagined that he was surprised to find out that the bathroom was different from the last time he saw it; they had remodeled recently. Her mother found out about minimalism and decided that it was time for everything in the bathroom to disappear from sight. Just an empty little white room with a plain sink, empty counters, a shower that looks like it had never been used before and a sad toilet. All white, all boring. All “classy”, as her mother had put it.

“Can you explain to me what’s going on?” She asked, before adding. “Properly, this time.”

He didn’t say anything and instead placed the objects he was holding on the countertop, which was empty and blank as usual, and started rummaging through the nearly empty cabinet next to the white and minimalistic sink, clearly looking for something. Dasha glared at what he had just put in front of her: it was a box of hair bleach, purple shampoo and a roll of plastic wrap. “Do you have, like, scissors or something-”

She didn’t like what was happening. “Vang0, please-”

“-maybe a comb-”

“Is all of this seriously about Burger and that girl you were telling me about?”

Vang0 stopped without looking up at Dasha. There was a moment of silence inside the soulless room, before- “he only likes her because she’s old,” he blurted out, before resuming his search. He didn’t seem angry, his tone was more disappointed, “she’s probably like, 25.”

“Do you even know who she is?”

He pulled out a simple black comb from the cabinet, “I’d never even-”

“The scissors are here,” Dasha opened a small drawer and pulled out a pair of simple black scissors.

“-seen her before in my life.” Vang0 looked up at her and grabbed the scissors. “Oh, thanks.”

Dasha leaned on the sink, crossed her arm and observed Vang0 compassionately, “so, what are you gonna do?”

He looked back at her, she could see in his expression that he was actually hurt by what he had seen earlier. He gestured at the air in front of him, “I mean…”, then he pointed at the box of hair bleach without saying anything.

“Okay,” Dasha nodded, “but did you have to come do it at my house at 2 am? Do you want me to do it for you?”

“I can do it by myself, I don’t need your help, it’s just that I…” Vang0 sighed and lowered his gaze. A beat, as he struggled to let the words that were on the tip of his tongue leave his mouth. Then he looked up, “I didn’t wanna be alone.”

Dasha softened. She didn’t expect that to be the answer. She nodded, “you get started, I’m gonna pour some coffee.”

“Oh, I-”

“Not for you, I know. I’ll get you your Spunky Monkey.”

Dasha left the bathroom, walking out of the door right as Vang0 said something along the lines of “cool, gamer juice,” and walked towards her kitchen. As she stood in front of her coffee machine she contemplated the situation.

Vang0 had never been easy to hang out with, but she couldn’t blame him - because neither was she. He was intelligent, sure, but most of the time he acted on impulse. He just did things without thinking too much about it. But not in a goofy kinda way, it was more a “I’m gonna say something because I know I’m right and I don’t realize that it might hurt someone” kinda way. Or in a “I don’t know what’s happening so I’m just gonna leave without saying anything and I don’t realize that other people may see this as impolite” kinda way. It wasn’t bad, it was just… different.

Dasha on the other hand, refused to have friends, she was better off alone anyways - she didn’t even refer to Vang0 as her friend. He was more like an associate, someone she’d solve/commit a crime with, rather than talk about crushes and personal stuff with.

And yet, there she was, pouring coffee for herself so she could stay awake to help him process… whatever the hell had happened. Dasha didn’t understand romance and she never planned on doing so, but she still found herself caring too much about Vang0 to leave him alone in that moment.

She guessed that both of them were so difficult to be friends with that they ended up being alone together. And, you know, it was nice having someone as smart as Vang0 to rely on from time to time.

Dasha grabbed her mug of coffee, stepped towards the fridge and pulled out a tall green can of Spunky Monkey, which she had asked her parents to buy specifically so that she’d have some for Vang0 when he came over, and she walked back to the bathroom while sipping from her mug.

Vang0 was standing in front of the mirror, comb in one hand, scissors in the other. He had already parted his hair and he had pulled one chunk in front of his forehead, which he was combing. “Ooh, bangs,” she pointed out.

“Yeah.”

“Here you go,” she opened the can and set it next to the sink, so that he could drink from it.

He looked down at the drink, then looked back up at the mirror, “thanks-” and he chopped off a few inches of hair, then threw the chunk in the toilet. He laid the scissors and comb down on the counter and took a big gulp of the energy drink.

“Have you had one already tonight?”

Vang0 silently nodded and grabbed the scissors again, he kept cutting bits of hair to make the bangs look even, until he was satisfied with the result. He turned to Dasha, who had almost finished her coffee in the meantime, and asked “how does it look?”

“You look ridiculous. In a good way,” Dasha smiled softly at him.

“That’s the goal,” Vang0 replied sarcastically. He looked at himself in the mirror for a while, probably trying to get used to the new cut. He passed both of his hands through his hair a couple of times, before grabbing the bleach and opening the box, bopping his head, “let’s fucking do this.”

Dasha opened the cabinet again and pulled out a pair of single use latex gloves, “want me to help?”

“Uhm…” Vang0 hesitated, as Dasha expected - she already knew that he wasn’t used to asking for help. “Maybe... maybe only if necessary. You could help with the back, I guess.”

She nodded, understanding, and handed him the gloves, Vang0 took them and put them on. Dasha took one last gulp of her coffee and left the mug on the countertop, then leaned on the doorframe and observed as he mixed the bleach inside the container. “You look like you know what you’re doing already.”

“Yeah, uh-” Vang0 kept his eyes fixed on the container, even when he used his free hand to take another gulp out of his can, “I read the instructions while walking here.”

Vang0 grabbed a chunk of his hair with his left hand and the bottle of mixed bleach with his right, hovering it over his dark hair.

He looked at Dasha’s reflection in the mirror standing right behind him, and she looked back at him. She wanted to assure him that she was there for him, but she wasn’t sure how to, so she just glared back.

There they were, staring at each other through a mirror, one needing support, and the other trying to give it. Neither knowing how to play their roles. This was the closest Dasha had ever felt to anyone. She understood from Vang0’s expression that he felt the same.

He lowered his hand and started spreading the bleach on his hair. Swift movements carefully covered each strand of hair, lifting chunks up and putting them on the other side. Vang0 was cautious and patient, but every so often Dasha could see his apparently steady hand twitch or tremble. She wondered if it was excitement or fear.

In the end, it wasn’t as difficult as they thought it would be, Dasha gladly helped him with the parts that he couldn’t see in the mirror and in a few minutes Vang0’s entire head was covered in bleach and plastic wrap.

“Actually, I could just keep it like this,” he joked, moving his head around and checking himself in the mirror.

Dasha chuckled as she was checking the time on her agent. “Regret to inform you that you can keep it until about 2:52,” she said as she set the alarm.

“Too bad.”

A moment of silence, followed by Dasha finally asking what she’d been thinking about the entire time, “so can you - calmly - tell me what happened now?”

Vang0 looked away from his reflection and turned to Dasha, he sighed before talking, “okay, but don’t ask questions.”

Dasha pursed her lips slightly, “sure.” That wasn’t going to be easy.

He sat on the border of the bathtub and gestured at Dasha to do the same, when she did he looked up at her, then looked back down. “So, I was just minding my own business at the park,”

“At 2 am?”

“What did I just say about asking questions?”

Dasha didn’t reply.

“As I said, I was at the park, it was around midnight, and in the distance I see two people. I recognize Burger immediately - large shoulders, tall, y’know, easy to recognize - but then I see this girl and, like, they’re talking and hanging out, right?” 

“That doesn’t mean that they’re dating-”

“But then,” Vang0 pushed both hands in front of himself, raising his eyebrows, “they walk away and i start following them-”

“-like a creep-”

“-I’m not a creep. And I follow them to Burger’s house-”

“-again, like a creep-”

“-and then I see them through the window and they were talking-”

“-like a-”

“-if you say “like a creep” one more time-”

“You did act like a creep, though-”

“Can you stop interrupting me?” He snapped.

Dasha tensed immediately at his change of tone, she realized that she was pushing him too much and then softened again. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He breathed in and then slowly out. “No, I wasn’t being creepy, I was just… worried? I just wanted to see what was happening. I acted like a…” Vang0 paused, probably trying to find a nice adjective to describe himself. Dasha could see in his expression that he gave up after less than 5 seconds, “...uh yeah that was kinda creepy, actually.”

She opened her arms as if to say “told you,” but didn’t say anything out loud.

Vang0 grunted, “it’s just that she’s blonde and pretty and tall and amazing and I’m…” he proceeded to gesture at himself with a disgusted face, “whatever the fuck this is. Nobody would want me - least of all Burger.” He sighed as he passed a hand on his face, careful not to touch the plastic wrap.

Dasha felt as if she had to say something, but she had no idea how to express what she was thinking in just words, so she simply put her hand over his shoulder, trying to comfort him. He put his hands over hers and smiled softly.

“At least I’ve got you.”

Correction:  _ that _ was the closest she’d ever felt with anyone.

“Fuck, that was cheesy.” Vang0 made a disgusted sound and laughed nervously, taking his hand off her immediately. “Sorry, you know what I meant.”

Dasha took her hand off of Vang0’s shoulder. “It’s okay, don’t apologize. I know what you mean.”

A long, uncomfortable silence followed that sentence, neither of them knew what was making it uncomfortable, but both of them knew that the other was feeling the same. It was like a weight was on both of their shoulders and they couldn’t figure out how to take it off. Dasha had to do something before it got worse.

“By the way,” she turned to Vang0, “the fact that they were hanging out doesn’t mean that they’re dating.”

“At midnight? At the park? And then at his house? Dasha, you’re smarter than that. Nobody takes their platonic friends out for a walk at midnight. And then take them home.”

“Well, do platonic f- uh, acquaintances call you in the middle of the night telling you that they’re bleaching their hair at your house?” Nice save.

“If they’re having a breakdown they do,” Vang0 gave her a sardonic smile.

Dasha raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, you’re right.”

When the alarm on Dasha’s agent rang, they both sighed of relief and stood up.

Dasha helped Vang0 rinse his hair, as he was bent down on his knees in front of the bathtub, head upside down trying as hard as humanly possible to not get any bleach on his face. Or at least she tried to help him, before hearing a “nononononononono- I can do it- don’t worry-” muffled completely by the water, followed by a few seconds of silence before a “actually, no, can you help me with the back- I-”

She laughed loudly and helped him rinse the back of his head. When all the bleach had washed off she grabbed the bottle of purple shampoo - “it’s supposed to make it lighter so it doesn’t look like complete shit” he had told her - that was on the counter for Vang0, and pointed out “your hair bleached really well, where the hell did you steal this bleach?”

“Oh, I don’t know, I just kinda grabbed the first one I saw at the drugstore?” Vang0 said as he barely raised his head, and turned on one side so he could kind of look at Dasha, but he really could only see her neck, “I guess I got lucky.”

“Uhm. Do you want me to put the shampoo on for you or-”

“Fuck no, that’d be awkward, pass the bottle.”

He reached his hand out towards Dasha’s general direction and she placed the bottle in his hand, “oh thank fuck, I thought you were expecting me to do it.”

As Vang0 put the shampoo on his head, Dasha stood up and walked back to the kitchen to make more coffee for herself and - reluctantly, since it was his third one of the night - grab another Spunky Monkey for Vang0, who on the other hand was used to ingesting worrying amounts of energy drinks daily.

All of it felt so relaxing, the coffee in Dasha’s system may have given her enough energy for hours on end, but she still managed to find peace in helping her frien- uh, Vang0 bleach his hair. It was a good feeling.

Through his unusually relaxed expression, she could sense that he was feeling that same good feeling too. Despite the ungodly hour, both of them found satisfaction in being in each other’s presence.

After waiting a while to let the shampoo do its thing and rinsing his hair once again, Vang0 looked at himself in the mirror for several seconds before saying anything. Dasha was afraid that he had gotten quiet because he didn’t like how it had turned out, maybe it was too light, maybe he just liked it better when it was brown.

“Holy shit, I look hot! Vang0 Bang0, baby” and he put up his hands to do his VB sign. You know, the usual Vang0 Bang0 shit. Seeing him throw up the sign felt almost like ho- familiar, it just felt familiar.

“You do look good.” Dasha nodded with a smirk. He looked more like himself.

Vang0 turned to face Dasha. “Thank you. For… everything I guess.”

“Sometimes you just gotta change your hair in the middle of the night” She shrugged. “What do you want to do now?”

“No idea,” he slowly lowered his gaze at his agent, before looking up again, “hey, it’s almost 4, we could go watch the sunrise.”

“That’s… actually a good idea, my balcony faces perfectly east and you can see the sun rising right in front of you.”


End file.
